The Board Member Who Changes Everything

Issue #56
4-minute read

Hi Reader,

I didn't pick her.

The nominating committee did, years before I ever sat across from her. By the time she joined our board, the decision was already made. I just inherited it.

She was a successful corporate executive. She held a high position, had strong connections, and didn't have time for unnecessary tasks. I gave her one goal for our annual event: help us find sponsors. I explained it once and gave her everything she needed—materials, context, and a clear request. That was all.

She went to her network. She didn't need me to follow up. She didn't need me to send the email again. She brought in sponsors worth $75,000, and when the event came, she brought her network with her. They gave too.

This happened more than twenty years ago. I don't remember her exact words or the order of the phone calls. What stands out is how little I had to manage her. Most of my board relationships take reminders, repeating myself, and chasing a yes that keeps slipping away. With her, I explained the goal once and then stepped back.

I think about this story whenever readers email me about a board member who won't take action. They all sound similar: the board member has ability and connections, but nothing happens. What am I doing wrong?

My honest answer, most of the time, is probably nothing.

We Don't Get to Choose

Here's the part we don't say out loud enough: most of us have almost no say in who joins our board.

The nominating committee builds the slate. We meet our new board members after the decision is made, not before.

In more advanced organizations, the nominating committee now includes fundraising and giving history in candidate profiles. That's progress. But we're still not involved in the choice.

So when a board member doesn't deliver, the instinct is to ask what we did wrong. Wrong onboarding. Wrong ask. Not enough cultivation. Sometimes that's true.

But sometimes the honest answer is: we were handed someone, and it didn't land, and no amount of process would have changed that.

We often feel quietly guilty about this. We create onboarding materials, schedule extra check-ins, and tell ourselves that explaining things better will solve the problem.

But you can't create motivation in someone who doesn't have it, or make up for a network that isn't there. We're not failing. We're just running into the limits of a system we can't control.

What I Did Differently

I've asked myself if I saw a signal in her early. Looking back, I'm not sure I did. I gave her the same thing I try to give every board member: a clear objective and the sources she needed to succeed. I didn't build her a special plan. I didn't cultivate her differently than anyone else on that board.

The difference wasn't my system. It was her. Her drive. Her connection to the mission. Her own will to see it through. I can't manufacture that in someone, and I can't take credit for it in her.

The Job That's Ours

If we can't select for this and we can't fully build it, what's left?

We do the work. Clear objective. What they need to succeed. No guessing about the ask. That's the baseline every board member deserves, whether they're the one who succeeds or the one who never quite engages.

And we stay ready. When someone shows they are ready to take action, we step aside quickly. We don't wait for permission to trust them or give them extra materials they didn't ask for. We let them take the lead.

Most board members won't be like her. That doesn't mean our system has failed. It's just the reality when we don't choose who fills the seat. But when someone like her does join, our job is to be ready and welcome them.

If your current board lets you down, you're not doing anything wrong. You just haven't met the right person yet.

Coming Next Week

Arc 3, Power, Politics & Influence, closes next Sunday. We've covered who opens doors, how to build the case they'll make without us, and the board members we're handed rather than chosen. Next week: the executive conversation that unlocks the funding.

Your Turn

Think about your current board. Pick one member you haven't fully activated yet. This week, do one of two things: give them one clear, specific objective or tell me you're not sure any of your current board has this in them. I'll feature the most honest answer next week.

Cheers,
Christine

PS — Not every stalled board member is the same problem. Some have no connections to work with. But if yours has a real connection and still won't send the email, I built something for that exact stall: the Board Engagement Playbook. Reply "System 9" and I'll send it to you myself.

Chief Fundraiser Weekly goes out every Sunday.

I’m Christine Bork, Chief Development Officer at the American Academy of Pediatrics. I write Chief Fundraiser Weekly to share what I’m learning as I lead a growing team and try to do the work in a way that’s sustainable and thoughtful.